New Stereotyped Barbies to Conform more accurately? ...by Sybil Sage

Concerned about preserving Islamic culture, Iran's Prosecutor General is striving to control the importation of Western toys, including Barbie, objecting that her dress is not conservative enough. This may lead to more young kids in China being sold to sweatshops to sew tiny Burkas to cover Iranian Barbie. Look for Ken to be costumed in a tan jacket in the tradition of the president of Iran.

In addition to adapting Barbie to conform to Islamic standards, it may be that Mattel will introduce a new line of Stereotyped Barbies that will represent a wider range of women, such as:

Thai Barbie - young, petite, straight black hair in traditional dress, accompanied by a massage table, while Ken is a bloated, older Western guy with credit cards;

French Barbie - topless bathing suit, cigarette dangling from her mouth, comes with her own glass of red wine and a permanent scoff at sight of Americans;

Korean Barbie- straight dark hair, complete with professional manicure set;

Israeli Barbie - wig over her blonde hair, modest dress, opaque stockings, with six kids and a stroller;

Mormon Barbie - long, pastel prairie dress, mounds of hair piled atop head, face expressionless and dazed, comes with set of identical other wives she shares with one Ken;

Cambodian Barbie - malnourished, boxed with limbless Ken, but prosthetics are available for purchase;

Trafficked Barbie - represents many countries, provocative wardrobe, no passport, is confined to a brothel along with other unfortunate victims.

If this leaves you uneasy, instead of buying Barbie dolls, contribute to appropriate organizations!