dr. scholl where are you?...by judi sadowsky

i know i live in los angeles and i know los angelenos can be crazy, but i must admit i never knew how crazy until yesterday. driving in beverly hills, i saw a line of about five hundred women weaving their way out the doors of barney's and down wilshire boulevard. all the women were wearing six inch heels and most of them seemed to be holding one or more shoe boxes in their arms. my curiosity got the best of me. i parked my car and got out - eager to solve the mystery of the high heeled masses.

it seems that the shoe designer, christian louboutin, he of the spiked heels and shiny red soles, was making a live, in store appearance, and was signing the soles of any and all his shoes brought before him. i had so many questions i didn't even know where to begin.

first of all, who were these women? most of them were young and obviously rich because the average price of these shoes hovers around $800. doesn't anybody work anymore? secondly, why would you want to have the soles of your shoes signed - by anyone? does the signing of these shoes, by the designer make them any more comfortable to wear? i think not. and lastly and most importantly, how could anyone, even young, rich women stand for hours in six inch stilettos, holding boxes of shoes in their arms? it looked like some weird reality show. whoever drops to the pavement first, unconscious, loses? the woman in the lowest heels gets voted off the line? is there a podiatrist on staff at barney's in case of emergency?

i keep reading that my generation, the baby boomers, drive our economy yet, when was the last time you saw a three block line of middle aged women waiting to get their mephisto's signed. i don't know if dr. scholl is still alive, but if he is, he should come out of hiding, grab a pen and climb on the band wagon.