The Polygamist wives, a motionless group seated on wooden chairs, their eyes strangely averted and distant, their voices thin and expressionless, hair meticulously and identically upswept, dressed in crisp, long, pastel prairie dresses, were on "The Larry King Show" last night, responding (or not responding) to his questions as if hypnotized or programmed. Each would say little beyond, "I want the children...I stand with the others...I am not aware of any marriages between an older man and younger girl." It was an eerie hour as they outstepped the Stepford wives.
Never smiling, speaking briefly when a question was put to them, they were objecting that state troopers, after being alerted that young girls were being forced to have sex with older men, had removed hundreds of children from the compound and were keeping them apart from their mothers. Each of the women who spoke denied having witnessed the sexual activity and Larry King didn't ask the obvious question: is there cloning at the ranch?
Much remains unclear, but what's certain is they're not reading "O" at the compound. I'm hoping the women will go on other TV shows as I'd like to see Oprah try to get through to them with her gentle, but probing, questions, which could be followed by their cooking with Martha Stewart, answering what we'd all like to know: with multiple wives, does one specialize in main courses, leaving desserts to another? Martha would surely update those sherbet-colored dresses, by which time they may be ready to face Stephen Colbert.