Sunday, September 9, 2007

What I Didn't Know When I Was Younger

There are two good things about being older: senior discounts and not getting so nervous (except while waiting for results of medical tests)

Spending more on wine and make-up doesn’t make them better

You can never stop working out

Being able to get anything on demand is good, whether it’s food, sex or just HBO

If you want to kill someone, hire a celebrity; they seem to get away with it

It’s dumb to fall for someone who’s married

One size does not fit all

Many hairdressers, therapists and diets will disappoint you

Though acupuncture can be extremely helpful, it’s hard to convince people to try it

Jet lag has a mind of its own and pays little attention to your resetting your watch

You can’t change a narcissist

My parents were wrong when they told me, "The people in Washington know what's best"

Don’t buy anything that’s advertised on TV in the middle of the night

Use more sunscreen than you want to

Trendy people are likely to be more insecure than they may appear

And, sadly, you'll have to learn all this for yourself!

No comments: