even gloria vanderbilt has needs

i have a confession to make. i am addicted to the first twenty minutes of "live with regis and kelly". i don't even like regis philbin that much and kelly ripa is way too skinny for me to ever consider haveing her for a friend, but there is something about host chat that has me hooked. perhaps it is seeing two very well dressed, well coiffed folk bantering as they sip their morning coffee. there is a lot being said in my house at nine a.m. but i can promise you none of it would fall under the heading of banter.

at any rate, regis was out today and in his place was, cutie pie, anderson cooper. somehow, during host chat, the conversation turned to technology. anderson disclosed that his mother, gloria vanderbilt (the original "poor little rich girl") was hopeless with anything electronic and called him often for help. he went on to say that one day his mother called and said "anderson, i am having trouble with my t.v., it won't go on." he answered "mom. i can't help you right now, i am on t.v." "i know honey, that is why i am calling you - i can't see you". "try pressing the power button, mom".

apparently, gloria doesn't just call her boy at the office. she called him when he was knee deep in flood waters in new orleans, when her printer wouldn't print and one time as bullets whizzed by his head in iraq. true he was in danger, but there is nothing worse than when you can't retrieve an e mail. i undrstand gloria and her needs. it is not our fault, we of the dial phone generation. you just can't teach an old dog new tricks which is why old dogs have puppies.

i too have a son who is also a cutie pie and also happens to have a job. he is as patient as a saint when i call him over and over and over again to explain the same simple process i just can't seem to get. he never yells at me, as i am sure he must often want to, and i don't ever remember him hanging up on me in mid-sentence. in spite of his super-human patience, however, i feel guilty bothering him. i often feel like the stupidest woman on the planet. i feel sorry for my first born child that he has been handed the burden of a technological incompetent for a mother. and that is why i love host chat.

had i not been watching "regis and kelly live" today i would never have known that gloria vanderbilt, who apparently has everything, still has to call her son at work for tech support. it just goes to show you, you never know what a person has to live with until you walk a mile in her jeans. i am sure, as soon as my son finds out that anderson cooper has to help his mother, he will feel much better about having to help me...constantly.